SELF: In our busy life we always think of others and act accordingly and never think of self from discovery point of view. We always try to handle the situations and crisis as per our experience but we don’t come out of it fully and satisfactorily. We blame others in given situation because we always hope that others will change and I will be happy. But it never happens and we blame our fate finally. The reason behind it is we are always confused about our goals of life. We focus on these points prominently in our self awareness program to give insights how to focus on self and discover from various angles. We provoke the delegates to think about how ‘I am responsible for everything that happens around.’ We aim to conduct the program in a practical sense to realize how we should work upon our SELF.
SELF-DISCOVERY THERAPY(SDT) & RATIONAL EMOTIVE BEHAVIOR THERAPY (REBT)is a theme which focuses on rational thinking and emotional balancing of human mind. We at every stage of life hope that we must think rationally to become a successful person and for that success we need to be a balance person to handle every situation which is unexpected and many times create crises. SDT &REBT teaches us to get awareness of SELF as well as others. It is a process to discover our mind parameters, components as well as structure. REBT was invented by Albert Ellis. This therapy works on Emotional management by rational thinking. To make change on thinking level different techniques has given by this therapy.
SELF-DISCOVERY THERAPY(SDT) & RATIONAL EMOTIVE BEHAVIOR THERAPY (REBT) includes :-
MEDIUM OF LANGUAGE : MARATHI
Systematic self Discovery technique
Application Techniques for betterment of self
A-B-C-D-E concept( Action- Belief- Consequences-Disputing-Effective management/ New feeling )
Irrational Beliefs & Thinking Errors
Self- talk and types of self talk
Appropriate & In-appropriate Emotions
Emotional management ( identification of healthy & unhealthy emotions)
Difference between Expectations and Demands, Feedback & Evaluation track of thinking and techniques of how to say ‘No’
Technique of Disputing of irrational belief systems
Decision Making & Goal Setting
Development of Assertiveness
A short synopsis of SDT & REBT is as follows
CONCEPT OF SELF
5 ‘W’s of “SELF’
Who am I?
What am I?
Where am I?
How am I?
Why am I?
WHO AM I?
What is your identity?
What is your existence?
What is your genetic background?
WHAT AM I?
My Properties / Characteristics / Components / Parts
WHERE AM I?
Block (from the past)
Inhibitions (from the society)
Reservations (within yourself)
HOW AM I?
Real self & Ideal self
Five Fundamental Things:
a) Being : State of ‘Being’
b) Having : materialistic people. Haves always suffer from underlined Frustration.
c) Knowing : Just collect the knowledge, least interested to apply it.
d) Relating :Always relate the things.
e) Doing : Successful peoples are always ‘Doers’
They enjoy the process of ‘doing’
WHY AM I?
“WHY DO I LIVE ON THIS EARTH?”
“WHAT DO I WANT FROM LIEE?”
“PURPOSE OF LIFE”
“To achieve happiness, mental peace, Satisfaction and success.”
BELIEFS OF PERSONALITIES
Aggressive People’s Beliefs
Submissive People’s Beliefs
Passive People’s Beliefs
Transactional Analysis is one of the most accessible theories of modern psychology. Transactional Analysis was founded by Eric Berne, and the famous “parent-adult-child” theory is still being developed. Eric Berne’s Transactional Analysis theories will enrich your dealings with people and enhance your understanding of yourself.
Significantly, the original three ‘Adult’, ‘Parent’ and ‘Child’ components were sub-divided into nine sectors and are referred to as “modes”
(NEGLIGENCE AND REJECTION)
B (Belief) = Perception + Acquisition+Past Experience + Practice
C (Consequence) Physical, Behavioral, Emotional
Within my control Beyond my control
Beliefs are abstract subjective opinions coming from sub-conscious mind.
Beliefs are as regards being, having, knowing, doing, Relating.
7 ERRORS IN PARENTING
- Attitudinal Block
- Cognitive Block (Black & White thinking)
- Physiological Block
- Emotional Block
- Stagnatory Block (Over confidence)
- Health/ constitutional Block (Handicapped)
- Organizational Block
- Ego block (Experience, age, professional)
- Professional Block (Seniority, Status, position)
- Block of Roles (Relation, Boss, Director)
- Block of Economical status
- Block of Commanding Position
- Block of fear & acceptance
- Block of faith
- Block of prejudice
- Block of challenge, change and success
SELF – TALK
What is self talk?
Communication with self!
Thoughts within mind.
It is Multi-tracked, fast, contains happenings of past, Present & future.
TWO TRACKS OF SELF TALK
HARMFUL SELF TALK HELPFUL SELF TALK
Emotion is a force which gives rise to Behavior.
All emotions are natural. In ancient times there were 3 types of emotions identified behind particular behavior.
1) Fighting Aggression
2) Fright / freeze Depression
3) Flight anxiety try to suppress it
Emotions are always appropriate in the beginning but after continuous SELF-TALK they change or go towards inappropriateness. Don’t allow it to go towards inappropriate emotion but work on appropriate emotion & do effective emotional management .
EXPECTATIONS & DEMANDS
“Beliefs are formed through expectations and demands”
FEEDBACK & EVALUATION
An individual may be on evaluation track or feedback track while interacting with other.
HOW TO SAY ‘NO’ WHILE SAYING ‘NO’
3 Stage of Disputing
1) Detection – Of problem, emotion, self talk & beliefs
2) Discriminate between harmful & helpful self-talk.
3) Debating with harmful beliefs.
Techniques of Disputing
1) Laddering Method – What if it happens?
2) Pragmatic Method (Evidence based)
3) Extracting Goals.
4) Challenging Rules. Challenge the rules of always, never or challenge his/her own rules.
5) Direct Confrontation.
4) To make the client face the reality through confrontation
“Decision means ‘act of becoming committed permanently’”
Two types of decisions 1) need based
2) Threat based
Major decision -
1) Educational & intellectual
2) Profession & Career
5) Place of work
7) Residential place
8) Recreation & enjoyment
9) Finance & investments
10) Health related
11) Having Children
12) Emotion related
Decision depends upon-
a) Liking, enjoyment, interest
b) ethical, moral values
c) information & facts
d) Holistic decision (based on reality)
e) Past experiences
Reasons for becoming indecisive
1) Values are not clear
2) Values are not identified
3) Multiple goals / Choices
4) No motivation for achievement
5) No responsibility of taking decision
6) Fear of consequence
7) Fear of change
8) Lack of fulfillment
9) Lack of patience
10) No consistency
11) Confusions / Conflicts
12) Cannot control impulse
13) Short term heroism
14) Lack of time management
15) Result oriented
WHAT IS A GOAL?
The goal is to decide the concrete task to achieve in action. Goal should be measurable, quantifiable & realistic.
Goals for achievement
Goals for earning & employment
Goal for career
Goal as a fun
Goal for recreations & enjoyment
Goal for lifetime mission
Goal for life achievement
What to do while setting Goals?
Decide the Goal first
Think on ‘clarity’ of Goals, Awareness of consequences
Awareness of cost & Price to be paid
Hypotheses the alternatives on reality basis
Types of Goals
1) Long Term Goal
2) Short Term Goal
3) Weekly Goals
4) momentary Goals.
Goal setting Depends on :
- Passionate interest or incidences in career
- Continuously doing till you die
- Gives you meaning and purpose to life
- It has to have some contribution to self & others
- Fulfillment of goal
- Alertness & awareness of freedom, rights and duties-
- There is some level of marketing
- Life time devotion
- Get happiness through all above.
“Assertivity is the psychological independence in a relationship “
An Assertive person is completely aware of following rights as regards to self & others:
1) right to live happily
2) right for any information
3) right for discussion
4) right for one’s own dignity (self-respect)
5) right for freedom for survival
LIVE AND LET LIVE IS THE BASIC PRINCIPLE OF ASSERTIVITY